Tag: featured

  • Recently Read! (September 2021)

    Recently Read! (September 2021)

    I’m sharing a few more recently read books from 2021!
    As I continue to catch up, here are my September reads.
    Have you read any of these? I’d love to hear what you thought!

    The Restoration of Celia Fairchild (Marie Bostwick)
    Celia goes through tremendous life changes, from the makeup of her family, to her career, a big move, and more. As she restores the home that has been left to her by her estranged aunt, she also changes and discovers who she is and what she wants from her life. There’s heartache and hope, community and introspection. Overall, a really wonderful read!

    Tiny Imperfections (Alli Frank & Asha Youmans)
    Josie is the admissions director of a private school in San Francisco, which also happens to be the same school her 17-year-old daughter, Etta, attends. Josie wants to keep her daughter from making the same mistakes she did, while Etta, together with a mentor, her aunt, and a cast of colourful characters all try to get Josie out of her comfort zone and to not let her past dictate Etta’s future. I loved how the storyline addresses different generations so seamlessly and how strong each of the women are in their respective ways!

    This Time Next Year (Sophie Cousens)
    Minnie and Quinn were born on the same day – January 1st! From literally the moment they were each born, their lives have intersected and often, unknowingly, affected one another. Minnie blames Quinn for the life she sees as one giant mess, while Quinn doesn’t necessarily have it so easy, regardless of how his life looks on the outside. A great read as we head into a new year, and an important reflection of what we do with the cards we are dealt as well as taking responsibility for ourselves.

    The Forest of Vanishing Stars (Kristin Harmel)
    This was a *very* different historical read than I’m used to! I was absolutely enthralled by the story line and couldn’t put it down. There’s a mystical element and a look into the Holocaust and Second World War that was startling. The writing was so powerful, you could almost feel the cold in the forest and the fear that was inherent in every movement. After being kidnapped as a young child, Yona finds herself on her own over a decade later, after having had no interactions with other people and having lived in the forest since her abduction. She feels a deep connection to Judaism and when she comes across a group fleeing into the forest, she goes against everything she knows and approaches them. The community they establish, the heartache, fear, and lengths they go to, as well as a shocking twist, made this an excellent must-read!

    Akin (Emma Donoghue)
    Noah is a widow and retired professor who lives on his own. Social services contacts him when a great-nephew needs a home, and despite his reservations, he decides to help out. When it looks like there are no other options, Noah decides to take his great-nephew on a trip of a lifetime that he had been anticipating for so long and ultimately wasn’t prepared to cancel. Returning to Nice for the first time since fleeing as a child during the Second World War, the discoveries and adventures they both find themselves a part of is both moving and powerful.

    The Dictionary of Lost Words     (Pip Williams)
    This was such an interesting read! It starts in 1901 with the daughter of one of the men working on assembling the first dictionary, stealing a word! Reading of Esme’s journey through childhood, youth, and adulthood through the lens of the creation of the dictionary was fascinating! As she continued to take and find words for herself that had been discarded or forgotten, she began to create her very own dictionary alongside that of the Oxford English version her father so diligently worked on. I actually got out our dictionary a few times to look up different words and see if the definitions had changed at all as I read along! This was really fantastic and one of my favourites this month!

  • Recently Read! (Catching Up)

    Recently Read! (Catching Up)

    As I continue to catch up on sharing my 2021 reads, here are a few more of my recently read books from late-summer!

    Have you read any of these? I’d love to hear what you thought!

    The Key To Happily Ever After (Tif Marcelo)
    This was a cute read that follows the de la Rosa sisters, Mari, Jane, and Pearl. They each have unique, strong personalities that come together to create a really charming and relatable story line. After their mother steps back from the family wedding planning business, the sisters assume greater responsibility and roles as they step up to maintain their family legacy. This doesn’t come easily and is accompanied by old feelings being brought to the surface and animosity between the siblings. The business itself almost seems like an additional family member and is the vehicle that has the potential to bring them all together despite often pushing them apart. It also brings new people into their lives, who effect changes that have been a long time coming!

    The Chicken Sisters (K.J. Dell’Antonia)
    I really enjoyed this book! It revolves around two competing chicken restaurants in Kansas. Chicken Frannie’s is run by Amanda and her mother-in-law, while nearby, Chicken Mimi’s belongs to Amanda’s mother. Amanda enters the restaurants in Food Wars, a television reality show, and surprisingly they’re selected to compete. The competition is fraught with family secrets, misunderstandings, a meddling producer, a heated rivalry, and plenty of unexpressed and unprocessed emotions that almost ruin both businesses. When an important bit of family history comes to light, it changes everything! I didn’t want to put it down and loved how the characters grew and changed over the course of the story. This is a great comedic and sentimental family rivalry to get lost in all while feeling like you’re getting a sneak peek behind the scenes of a Food Network show!

    People We Meet On Vacation (Emily Henry)
    Poppy and Alex were the very best of friends, until two years ago when their relationship fell apart. Time continued to pass without either working to make amends and clear the air, and as miscommunications and misunderstandings grew, so too did the distance between them. Before everything fell apart, one of the things they’d most look forward to was their annual vacation together. Poppy decides to reach out and try to convince Alex to go away again. He agrees and together they endure mishap after mishap, pushing them to face both the reality that is the disaster of their trip and their attitude towards one another. The book goes back and forth between trips they’d taken in the past and the one they are currently on, and it’s so interesting to see who they were at one point and the dynamic of the friendship compared to the present timeline.

    How To Be Fine (Jolenta Greenberg & Kristen Meinz)
    I hadn’t heard of the How to Be Fine podcast prior to reading this book. If you have, you may already be familiar with the author’s voices, so to speak, and their style. Having come to it without previous knowledge of them, it was fun to really get a feel for their different opinions and perspectives through their reviews and respective approaches to each self-help concept. Overall, I really loved this premise! There are so, so many self-help books out there that navigating the variety available is overwhelming to say the least. To be able to read their perspective and opinion on 50 different texts was enlightening and oftentimes hilarious. They are unfailingly honest in their reviews and their vulnerability in sharing personal stories, in relation to different books or schools of thought, was refreshing. After living by each self-help book for a period of time to determine how helpful the guidance provided really is, this book is divided into what worked for them and what didn’t. I think it’s important to keep in mind that this is their opinion and to take it all with a grain of salt. If something works for you and didn’t for them, it doesn’t mean anything negative about you (or vice versa!). They are very clear in this as well and often address differing opinions, through letters written to them, throughout the book. I found that their respectful approach to differing opinions as well as their leaving room for differences, for the most part, made it even more helpful. If you’re overwhelmed by the selection of self-help books available or want a little more detail before diving into one, this is a great read! 

    The Secret Path (Karen Swan)
    Last summer, I read my first Karen Swan novel and then proceeded to read five more! I was so excited for this release and it did not disappoint! Tara has worked hard to make a name for herself, independent of her affluent family, and she’s done just that by entering the medical field and doing what she can to help others. Just before she’s set to go to Costa Rica for a dedication ceremony for an endeavor her father has had in the making for years, she loses a patient. This shadows everything from the moment she leaves. When she comes across a desperately ill child on the island, she sets out to do absolutely whatever she can to help him, regardless of how dangerous the trek. There is danger and suspense, romance, and the return of a past relationship that scarred her deeply. It’s a great read filled with adventure, as Tara comes to terms with the past, present, and future!

    The Four Winds (Kristin Hannah)
    This was one of the hardest, saddest books I’ve ever read. It is a very heavy and long read. At one point, I stopped and just could not get over how these characters just could NOT catch a break! Admittedly, I knew very little about the Dust Bowl era, the drought and full effect of the Great Depression on the south. Kristin’s writing is startling in the sense that you can almost taste the dust as you read of the many storms the characters face. The grief on each page is almost tangible. After a traumatic childhood, Elsa does whatever she can to manage her way through the storms and help her in-laws maintain their home. She ultimately takes her children and makes the trek to California in hopes of a better life, and at the very least, cleaner air. Her daughter, Loreda, grows up much faster than she should have had to, and reading of her childhood essentially going up in dust, adds another traumatic element to the story line. As with her other novels, Kristin’s ability to shape a hero out of such dark times is remarkable. The same can be said for this story and Elsa’s strength and perseverance, and subsequently Loreda’s as well.

  • Recently Read! (Catching Up)

    Recently Read! (Catching Up)

    It’s been at least a few months since I’ve shared any of my “Recently Read” wrap-ups with you! I’m hoping to catch up before the end of the year and will share a bunch of these over the next few weeks! 📚

    Here are a few favourites from late-summer!

    Have you read any of these? What did you think? 

    Meet Me In Paradise (Libby Hubscher)
    This was beautifully written! It balanced a romantic story line as well as the moving tale of two sisters. It’s one of the very few books this year that had me in absolute tears. I don’t remember the last time I didn’t want to finish a book just to avoid what seemed like an inevitable ending. Marian and Sadie are about as opposite as sisters can get, and the way they push each other to change and grow, while still remaining close, was so special. Lucas was written perfectly, there to fill in everything that was needed but adding just enough on his own to play a critical role in the lives of both women, while he himself grew as well. I don’t want to say too much to give any of it away, but I will say it’s a must-read – just make sure to have a ton of tissues nearby!

    Finlay Donovan is Killing It (Elle Cosimano)
    This was so well written and had me hooked from the first page! Finlay and Veronica are hysterical and the many escapades in which they find themselves in, from crimes to crime-solving, are ridiculous but also come together seamlessly to create a fantastic story! It’s absurd but it’ll also have you turning the pages as quickly as possible, trying to figure it all out alongside them (while laughing non-stop!). Finlay is a stressed out single mom and author who is in desperate need of more income after her husband left her. As she’s speaking to her agent at a restaurant, someone overhears her and believes that she is an assassin- when in reality she had just been describing the plot of the book she was working on. It doesn’t matter how many times she explains this, the woman won’t take no for an answer and before she knows it, Finlay is at the center of a crime, her nanny Veronica assumes the role of her accomplice and it seems that everything they do, no matter how good their intentions are, just leads them further into trouble. One of my favourite reads this year and I’m SO thrilled there’s another coming out next year!

    The Chanel Sisters (Judithe Little)
    This was a fascinating read! I didn’t realize how little is actually known (& confirmed to be accurate) regarding the Chanel family. The story line is firmly grounded in a mixture of facts with plenty of fiction interspersed to fill in gaps. I was surprised at “Coco’s” story line, having had completely different assumptions as to who she was and what her journey to being a fashion icon entailed. If anything, as I was reading it, I was sure that Antoinette was “Coco” as she seem to play such a critical role. I appreciated that Judithe wrote this story with such a focus on her, rather than Gabrielle, who would indeed go on to be known as Coco. The descriptions of their incredibly humble beginnings, family dynamics, and the obstacles they had to face and overcome to get to where they eventually landed, both plentiful and dramatic, were relayed powerfully and in a way that encouraged me to look into the sisters’ story after I had read the last page!  

    Family Law (Gin Phillips)
    Lucia’s story as an ambitious lawyer, living in Alabama in the 80s, is one filled with suspense, frustration, and harassment. She is practicing in a time where women were a minority in the profession and the way she is treated as a result of this fact is awful. I constantly felt like something was about to go horribly wrong and many scenes were set up to create an undeniable sense of suspense. I was constantly both fearful of what was about to happen and desperately curious to ensure Lucia made it out well. Pairing her character with Rachel, the daughter of a potential client, highlighted just how unique Lucia was in this era, especially given the glaring ways in which Rachel’s mother and Lucia are so very different. This added a great dimension to the whole story line. Rachel’s seeming awe of Lucia and the way she navigates her own circumstances come together to round out a powerful story. I did feel like the ending was abrupt after such a dramatic series of events, and would have liked to know more about how the characters went forward. 

    The Apple Orchard (Susan Wiggs)
    The art history major in me was immediately drawn to this book upon reading the jacket! Tessa works in the art world, reconnecting patrons with their lost and stolen artwork. While she works to resolve the history between timeless artifacts and their rightful owners, her own history itself is a question mark. When she finds out the grandfather she had no knowledge of is in a coma, her entire life (and family) quickly begins to change and expand. The bearer of this news, Dominic, continues to play an important role in her story, as he’s the push, and oftentimes support, she needs as she begins to re-evaluate everything. There were a lot of twists and turns, mysteries, pieces of priceless art, family secrets, and even a romantic story line as well. Such a great read!

    Happiness For Beginners (Katherine Center) 
    After reading Things You Save in a Fire earlier this year, I requested more of Katherine’s titles right away! In this book, Helen, 32 and recently divorced, signs up for a wilderness survival retreat/course that ends up being significantly more difficult than she anticipated. I had assumed  and gone into this book thinking it was going to be the story of how one woman went on this trek and found out who she truly was while embracing and flourishing in her newfound independence. I was surprised to find that the story line was mainly focused on the relationship between Helen and another participant who she happened to already know. The atmosphere was very high school-like among all of the members in her group, with nicknames, bickering, relationships, and cliques forming. I did like how different each of the characters were and how they complemented each other. The camaraderie between them and the way they naturally brought out one another’s strengths and weaknesses as they made their way through the sometimes dangerous terrain, was fantastic! By the end, I couldn’t imagine them parting ways, back to their own lives! 

  • Gifting Guide (Part 1)

    Gifting Guide (Part 1)

    Recently, it seems as if every other post on my feed is a gift guide or sale alert! While I appreciate the ease of having options and deals all put together in one place for me, as so often happens on social media, I just don’t feel like it applies to us.

    I always appreciate the questions from friends and family around holidays and birthdays regarding what to get the kids, and Y specifically. I will admit, it can get overwhelming. There is a lot to consider, both on Y’s end and for our friends and family as well. Gifts he’d prefer could be harder to locate, require ordering well in advance, or may not really seem like a gift in the traditional sense (of course this is a wonderful issue to have and I’m so grateful for the love and generosity of our circle!). If you find yourself in a similar situation, whether as someone looking to purchase a gift or someone looking for ideas to share with family, I’ve put together a few tips and ideas in an attempt to make gifting as stress-free and appropriate as possible! These are all aspects I take into consideration and I believe can be applied fairly generally. I hope this provides clarity and is insightful and helps to make this season a little less stressful!

    5 Things To Keep In Mind:

    Age / Popularity:
    Many websites will highlight the best gifts for a certain age group or the hottest and most sought after toys of the year. While I appreciate the guidance this provides, it isn’t always applicable to Y. His interests remain fairly consistent and don’t necessarily change with the latest movie or series. The age range advertised does not reflect a wide developmental spectrum and is better understood as appropriate for children who are neurotypical and of that age. A gift labelled for a seven-year-old may not be accessible for a variety of reasons. Of course, this is all very personal and if the family or the recipient think it may work, then by all means, go for it!

    Safety Considerations:
    Please ask if there are any safety concerns that should be taken into consideration. You may see an item that you think is perfect, but if the recipient is currently in a stage where they are mouthing things / bringing everything to their mouth, for instance, smaller toys or things with batteries or magnets could pose a serious, elevated risk.

    How You Wrap The Gift:
    Accessibility doesn’t apply solely to the gift that you choose! I’ll admit, I love seeing all the gifts wrapped up in coordinating wrapping paper, piled lovingly, waiting to be excitedly torn into! For years I thought Y would love the act of ripping off the wrapping paper, with all it’s sensory and tactile fun! That wasn’t the case, and if anything, it just caused a lot of frustration. We’d help by ripping a little corner to help him start off and then guiding him to do the rest, but by the time he had removed a sufficient amount, he was no longer interested and re-directing him back to the actual gift could be difficult. The past few years, I’ve simply put his gift into gift bags with very little tissue paper or distractions and it has made all the difference! He happily pulls out each item and it’s less frustrating! Consider the developmental ability of the recipient and how they’re best able to access the gift in a way that is meaningful and enjoyable to them!

    Expectations:
    On that note, it’s so important to do what you can to make the experience memorable and enjoyable for the recipient. I’ll be the first to say that I love seeing reactions when gifts are being opened! The excitement is tangible and I can’t help but explain what it is, or point out fun features, and of course, hope that the reaction received is a favourable one that reflects my anticipation. Nothing compares to seeing Y light up, knowing that he feels seen and heard, that we gave him something he truly loves or enjoys. The way that he shows this is not always what others may expect. One year he ran to his room with the first item he opened, before opening any other gifts, and went to play right away! Another year, he matched the items while still in their boxes (matching is something he absolutely loves to do!) and didn’t want us to open them yet, as he smiled and concentrated on lining up the boxes. Of course, there have also been times he’s put down the item and has gone back to playing with whatever he was holding before. Giving him the space to experience and explore what he’s been given is so important and I always keep in mind that the respect shown to him in that moment is more important than the gift or our own need for acknowledgment. 

    Consider the Atmosphere / Environment:
    Finally, building off of the previous point, as much as I love to see the reactions of the recipient, sometimes it’s just not the best option. Birthday or holiday parties can be a very overwhelming sensory experience. Between the crowd, multiple conversations taking place, lights, sounds, music, people walking around / moving from one area to another, smells of food and perfume etc., it’s A LOT. Having to be the center of attention, with everyone watching, as gifts are opened can just be too much. Taking the gift home or going to a quiet space alone to open it may be more meaningful and appropriate for the recipient. This doesn’t reflect any selfish, “anti-social,” or negative sentiment at all, it simply is what is best for the individual and if that is the case, respecting it and everything I’ve mentioned in the points above, is even greater than any physical gift!

    I’ll be sharing Part 2 shortly, with gift ideas that are accessible in terms of developmental considerations as well as at a variety of price points! If you don’t want to miss it, make sure to subscribe to the blog or follow along at @ItsyBitsyBalebusta!




  • Let’s Be Real

    Let’s Be Real

    In recent years, there has been a beautiful push to create an environment where moms feel safe sharing that things are hard. Across Facebook and Instagram, photos and stories of moms crying in a locked bathroom or sitting in their car, allowing themselves to feel all of their emotions, are more and more common. The resounding sentiment has been that it’s okay to be honest and truthful about the beautiful, chaotic, exhausting, and absolutely incredible experience of raising children. Not for a second is anyone saying they aren’t grateful, that they don’t recognize others would and often are doing everything they can to become a parent themselves, and that it isn’t a burden but a blessing.

    In recent years, you don’t have to look hard to find a niche where you can find other moms making similar choices, whether it comes to feeding, sleep, or more! Exhausted mom memes and relatable reels abound. Every day, the idea that it’s okay to be honest about our different motherhood experiences grows and it’s both wonderful and necessary. The knowledge that always parading around shouting #blessed is not realistic is well overdue. 

    But (because this is obviously leading somewhere, right?) it doesn’t seem to extend to every mom.

    As a mother of a child with a disability, I don’t feel like this applies to me. I feel like I need to always be on, never complain, accept and do and keep going and going and going, and never once say that this is HARD. I’ve seen other mothers of autistic children be torn apart in comment sections when they’ve attempted to breach the line between being positive and an unbreakable caregiver who only sees the good, and an honest mom who’s tired and scared and defeated. Who’s sad and who feels guilty about that sadness, and more upset at herself over it than anyone else could ever be with her (try as they might, in those dreaded comment sections).

    I’m feeling conflicted about sharing here when it comes to autism. On the one hand, I don’t feel right sharing about the more difficult moments, as I haven’t quite figured out how to share from my perspective and experience as a mother without including the details that are personal and belong to my son. On the other hand, looking over my feed, I hate that any parent of an autistic individual would come across these little squares and see outings and highlights and the many moments of joy we’re blessed with, and not see the whole picture either. The reality is that this is a rollercoaster. Just as there are highs, there are also lows, and right now, in this space, those lows look like silence. They look like days without posts or stories, weeks without meaningful words to share. I want this space to be about community and empowerment. I want it to be a visual journal where I share what I’m learning (often as I’m learning it) and how our family is really not so different. How my journey through motherhood is still accessible and relatable. It’s about advocacy and AAC and autism. About books and family adventures and all the little things that come together to form our day-to-day. To celebrate the achievements without acknowledging the struggles seems deceitful, but to share the struggles seems questionable too.

    There is so much isolation when you have a child with a diagnosis, that you really start to believe no one gets it. But how could they when you don’t share? The pages that openly discuss elopement and sensory struggles among other topics, bring me such comfort and peace, knowing there are other parents navigating the same challenges. A place where we can share referrals or programs, tips that have worked or simply be there for one another. I want to provide the same here, but how do I do that in a way that’s respectful to Y, but still acknowledges my experience as well?

    Over the past few months, I’ve shared countless family adventures and books I’ve been reading. I’ve shared my favourite nail polish colours and how I’ve been refreshing the arrangement of our play area daily. I’ve shared mugs and memes, toddler escapades, and even managed a post on AAC before #AACAwarenessMonth was up.

    Know what I haven’t shared? New challenges we’re facing that keep me up at night. I didn’t think it was anyone’s business, and worse, that I would be attacked for complaining when others have it so much worse. Or how about, how dare I say it’s hard on me when it’s a million times harder on Y?

    I haven’t shared that.

    But maybe it’s time to share the harder moments too. How can I advocate for better provincial support for my child when one look at the life I share makes it look like we don’t need that much help at all? How can I reach out to other parents on their pages when they share their experiences and say that I can relate or that I appreciate their honesty and vulnerability, when if they look at my page they’ll essentially see one large #blessed billboard?

    I’m still not sure how to approach this, but I know that I need to. I’m still not sure how much I’ll share but I know it won’t ever be from Y’s perspective – simply because I can’t and I personally feel it’s wrong to even attempt to. My page won’t suddenly become about hardship and struggle, because that isn’t truthful either. We are so blessed and there is so much good every single moment of every single day, even when it’s hard to see. What does this mean? It means I’m going to start sharing more about elopement, in the hopes of increasing awareness of the concept and hopefully to feel less isolated in this challenge and learn together. I’m going  to start sharing lessons we’ve learned when we’ve encountered challenges out and about – lessons that wouldn’t make sense unless you also know what exactly the difficulty was. I have spent the last 7 years doing everything I can to ensure Y has every single opportunity, service, and door open to him. That he is never lacking and that whatever he needs to meet challenges or thrive is offered to him, as much as possible. That he is surrounded by knowledgeable, loving, supportive, and capable people, who have his best interests at the forefront of their actions and whose ability to help him navigate challenges, reach goals, and thrive is excellent. I will continue to do this and more for him, every day of my life. It’s just time that I start to do the same for myself as well.